Take it from Leo Getz: "Don't ever go up to the drive-thru; always walk up to the counter...You know why? Because they FUCK YOU at the drive-thru!!"
I don't know if this has ever happened to you or "they're" just out to get me...But this happens to me alot and it is really starting to fucking irk me...
I roll up to the drive-thru window, order the shit that I know will be the cause of my death, much sooner than later, but I'm hungrier than fuck and there's no way anyone is gonna stop this runaway locomotive now; plus have YOU ever tried backing the fuck out of a drive-thru window once you've drove in?? Anyways, I hand the punk kid drive-thru guy my money and await patiently for the 2 cents he owes me in change.
Not that I own one of those gay fucking change purses or 'man bags' you see these 'metro' fuckers are carrying around town these days, but I have become pretty proficient in finding the correct change on the floor or in the seats of the minivan. Now I mind you I am fairly adept at math, being of Asian descent and University educated and all, the amount I hand over is usually in close range of what I owe, sometimes really close; most times exactly, because that's how I roll...
The drive-thru guy then hands me my food I've ordered and says, "Have a nice day.." completely skipping his end of the money transaction of handing over my change, and avoiding eye contact obviously knowing he has just skiffed me on my 2 cents!
I just then come to the realization that what we're dealing with here is a shrewd minded criminal working on his master plan to rip every cash paying customer by pennies, so at the end of the day, he makes off with his $4 bucks of tax free cashola! That Mother Fucker!!
What the fuck is this world coming to anyways??
Did I miss the memo involving new policies in consumer transactions where a nominal "tip" is automatically tacked on the total sum of the bill, whether you know about it or not?? I do realize the Canadian government is trying to do away with the penny and we, Albertans, have become quite the self-entitled, self-centred assholes since the last oil boom, but is there a new entitlement tax now I am unaware of?? Have we become such a society practicing such degeneracy that we have become so fucking lazy it's not worth our while to return MY two cents? Or is it because we've all become so dependent on using credit and debit cards, that we have actually forgotten how cash works?
In addition, I do not especially appreciate the identity crisis I am now faced with every time this happens. Am I the type of piker who stews over 2 cents?? I mean seriously, the reason I work so hard to acquire wealth and money is so I don't have to put up with the bullshit of haggling over a $4000 kitchen table or a $5000 flat screen TV in the first place... So is my dignity worth taking a financial hit of mere pennies??
Now you're probably thinking, geez..it's only two cents buddy...mere pennies... I mean if it was me behind that window, I would be thinking, "Fuck dude, relax, it's only a couple of pennies... times must be tough or what, buddy..."
Now, what if the drive-thru guy scams you for $5? $20? $100? Let's say you use your debit card or credit card instead and the drive-thru guy skims it with another magnetic stripe reader he has stashed under the counter so he can wipe out your entire net worth by tomorrow?? How about huckster bankers fudging numbers to the tune of $50 billion before releasing any financial statements?
But this is different you say? How the fuck can you compare Lehman and the drive-thru window at McDonald's, to each other? The Lehman scam involved egregious sums of money...millions, billions, trillions of dollars we're talking here; wiping out the global economy as we know it.. while the drive-thru..'mere' pennies.
Really?
So when you dickwads, talk shit like, "it's bullshit Apple can have patents for little nuances as a rectangular shape with rounded corners..", "I can't believe something as little as 'pinch and zoom' , Apple is fretting over..", " Note to Apple. I have a TV with runded edges and one that is rectangular, and I've seen round and square TVs in the past. Your move..", "patents should be abolished...they inhibit innovation..", you obviously think it's utter bullshit everyone making a such big deal of patents and some pretty minut details on a fucking phone... So Samsung should get off without consequences then over such small and foolish details such as patents?
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| Oh look..Dipshit is at it again... |
Well, this involve billions of dollars too. How is this so different than Lehman?
Because it's not. It's the principle of it, fuckface. It's not about rounded bezels or pinch zooming or rectangular shapes. Stealing is still stealing no matter how small or big the amount.
If you disagree, then NO ONE should wonder as to why NOT one fucking charge has been brought against anyone regarding the biggest bankruptcy in US history??
Time to start "sweating the small stuff"... and I'm not your "buddy"..
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